I know, I know. This topic has been done to death. However, as we’re two days out from Apple’s “See you on the 7th” event, I thought it’d be fun to list my personal pros and cons of eliminating the headphone jack. 

Cons

• Without a cable, baby will have one less thing to yank on while nursing. How will he occupy his hands? What will he coat with his drool?!
• I won’t be able to practice identifying nautical knots several times a day after retrieving my earbuds from my pocket.
• After I drop my phone in water for the 19th time, I won’t experience the simple joy of digging a single grain of rice out of the headphone jack.

Pros

• I love remembering to charge things!
• I’ll no longer be spoiling my ears with high quality audio. Take that, you pompous flaps of cartilage.
• My phone will finally be thin enough to mince garlic on the go.
• I love having to triple-check whether my headphones are paired so that sudden noise doesn’t wake Charlie. Aw, who am I kidding? I love it when he wakes up from his naps early!
• Don’t tell anyone, but I dream of buying dongles. Especially when they’re $29.99. Especially when I’ll probably lose them.
• Wireless stuff is so so so reliable always. And easy to use in old cars too.

Wow. After reviewing my pro and cons list, I’ve determined that I actually don’t care what happens to the headphone jack. If Apple thinks this will propel us into a perfect future filled with pure, unadulterated Slabs of Glass, then who are we to stand in the way? ?